Sponge bath it is.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
