This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize