I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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