aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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