i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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