okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
