So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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