so I'm never txting u again after today...
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woke up backwards on a recliner
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"