she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...