I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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