well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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