So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
