i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
