You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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