what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
he had hair everywhere except his balls
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
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