Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
