I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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