I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Every concussion has its silver lining
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
