This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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