know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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