my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
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