Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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