Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
