I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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