Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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