I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
