I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
