Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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