So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
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Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize