He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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