Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize