I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
