Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
My liver is preforming stress tests.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
