508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
