even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
