Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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