i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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