is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
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