There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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