I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
my liver is dry heaving
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
