I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
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is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
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When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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