He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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