This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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