I have demons in me.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
