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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I guess God knew he was going to be bald...

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• (619): View more from California

  Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (201): View more from New Jersey

  He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C

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• (310): View more from California

  We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.

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• (949): View more from California

  We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..

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