Texts From Last Night

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  (989): View more from Michigan

  News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.

  (1-989): View more from Michigan

  Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.

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  (989): News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus. (1-989): Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right. http://tfl.nu/jho0
  Replies (22) Good night (4587) Bad night (967)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere

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  (908): it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere http://tfl.nu/0cj1
  Replies (17) Good night (6708) Bad night (1013)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  gotta love wednesdays

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  (309): In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st. (217): gotta love wednesdays http://tfl.nu/3grc
  Replies (21) Good night (4142) Bad night (1021)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.

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  (262): we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere. http://tfl.nu/ddqg
  Replies (9) Good night (1790) Bad night (2690)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?

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  (602): I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon? http://tfl.nu/25nz
  Replies (11) Good night (2430) Bad night (927)
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  (310): View more from California

  what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?

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  (310): what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car? http://tfl.nu/714f
  Replies (7) Good night (923) Bad night (2480)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT

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  (703): THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT http://tfl.nu/gmdd
  Replies (6) Good night (2823) Bad night (699)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.

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  (815): sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night. http://tfl.nu/z8wo
  Replies (6) Good night (1933) Bad night (1033)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers

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  (864): I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers http://tfl.nu/0wmu
  Replies (5) Good night (1582) Bad night (594)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it

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  (828): It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it http://tfl.nu/e4ef
  Replies (9) Good night (2118) Bad night (477)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..

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  (740): I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now.. http://tfl.nu/kgaa
  Replies (2) Good night (853) Bad night (249)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt

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  (757): I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt http://tfl.nu/qfiy
  Replies (4) Good night (793) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Whore are you.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Yes.

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  (202): Whore are you. (301): Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am? (202): Yes. http://tfl.nu/xx42
  Replies (3) Good night (1516) Bad night (293)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.

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  (303): Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year. http://tfl.nu/qzma
  Replies (1) Good night (393) Bad night (348)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.

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  (305): Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge. http://tfl.nu/xogn
  Replies (1) Good night (189) Bad night (461)

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