He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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