WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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