Dual....:-)
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize