Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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