you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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