Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
