Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
organizing the empties. That sober.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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