Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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