we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize
